Do you know? The speed at which cherry blossoms fall... At what speed must i live, To be able to see you again?

5 Centimeters Per Second, subtitled "a chain of short stories about their distance." is a 2007 Japanese animated feature film by Makoto Shinkai.

5 Centimeters per second is the speed at which cherry blossom petals fall, In the film , it also means "the speed of a person's changing by passing of time."

"The movie is named 5 Centimeters Per Second for the speed at which cherry blossom petals fall, petals being a metaphorical representation of humans, reminiscent of the slowness of life and how people often start together but slowly drift into their separate ways." said by Makoto Shinkai.

At What Speed Must I live...

...to be able to see you again.

when i was a little girl ,  I was fond of painting. Even before i enter the elementary school,  i studied painting in an art training center.  i studied painting for nearly 8 years,  however,  when i entered my  junior middel school, my parents told me that i should study hard in Math,  physics and chemistry.   Paiting is just an interest,  not a major.  I would get a good job by these subjects, not painting.

yes, even i was a  junior school at that time,  i has known that diploma in a great college is very important.   so i gave up painting and started to be a good student.   Later,  i entered No.1 senior  school of my city and got a diploma in college.  As what my parents told me, i got a good job by it.

sometimes i think that if i insisted on painting, what am i doing now? i dont regret, if time flow backwards, i may made the same decide again, even i really like painting very much.  there are many crossings in my road, i only  can choose one way to go.  so, continue...

some of pics i made this Sunday. ( about two of my favorite idols: Akanishi Jin and Ayumi Hamasaki ) just for fun, i like it.

Something need to be changed. but i dont know what "sth" stand for. maybe my work, maybe my lifestyle, maybe my manner towards friends and colleagues.

I`m the last one came into my work team, but i dont want to be the last one in the achievement of the team. They have more than one year`s experience to me. How can i shorten the distance from me to them? Maybe "the last one" is the first thing i want to change.

Two weeks ago, i began to play wow. i haven`t played mmo for many years. i`m not interested with wow, but colleagues said that i lacked game experience, playing wow is beneficial to my work. so, i played.

At the beginning, i made many foolish mistakes, some colleagues laughed me. Although i know they just joked, i still feel embarrassed. i continued the game and played harder than before. i leveled up quickly, at frist, i want to surpass ryunna, because she was the last one before i played. some days later, i surpassed not only ryunna, but also yiwind, vina and shine.

however, one day, when my charcater died in the game, someone laughed me. i suddenly found that nothing has changed. i was still laughed even i played harded and have high levels.

nothings has cha

Sometimes you win, sometimes you lose. I remembered this sentence when i go to work this morning.

This morning, i meet someone looks like the girl i feared extremely. i trembled and wanna run off. When she came to me, i finally found she is a stranger, not the person im afraid of.

At that time, i dont know whether i would laugh or cry.  

When i was a child, i was the person who want to be no.1, No matter the result is good or bad, if i was the best among the competitors, i was satisfied. Even just better than others a little.

Maybe im conceit and greed, i always wanna get anything i suppose. so, if i lose, i will have much more stress which i give to myself.

However, i was failed completely at that time. i never thought i would comedown like this. I was cried, raged but nothing changed. I didn`t know whether she deride me, i just know the momeries i would remebered always, even i wanna forget completely.

But it`s a nice warning for me. the momery always awake me and let me stronger.

I always want to be the last one alive in Battle Royale, maybe i need more courage, more intelligence, more effort, even some stratages.

(maybe some good luck and friends indeed, lol)

I always say i dislike this place to Mike,  as the unique friend in college even in this city, he understands me. He is a mature boy and eveytime i was sad or  confused, i turned to the him for help.

Of course,  i know the principle he told me,  but if i really dislike it, what should i do? How can i smile to the sunrise in this city?

My mother told me that every place is the same, u must  adapt it. If you leave, will you live a better life? Maybe it`s worse, at that time, what will you do? Maybe you will regret.

Yes, i know. i really know.

Why im here now?  just because i studied here? i have lived in this city for four years, so i can find a work eazlier than other cities? In this National Day, father told me Henry has gone to JP, just now, Irene told me she would go to the city where i look forward to, why can they go to the space where i want to, but i still here.

I`m a coward, i want to get more but i don`t want to give up the tings i have. i want to leave but i bothered whether i can get a better life.

 Who can give me courage or bring me leave? Who can let nightmare not bother me? Everytime i memory those day , i tremble and want to cry in my mother`s shoulder.

If no one can help

According to industry insiders, SQUARE ENIX China (SEC) had called on a full-employee meeting, announcing the disbandment of company.

SEC used to operate MMOs like Crossgate 2, Fantasy Earth, and Tree World.Although the short-lived Tree World, the Crossgate 2 has been fully expected, and will enter into operation very soon. IF SEC really disbanded, then the destiny of Crossgate 2 will surely in doubt.

But till now, SEC have no any comments on this issue. And its offical website and the games are still in operation.